The Taj Mahal comes to Brighton


Emily Sargent

In the wake of the iPhone 5’s release, there were bound to be a few glitches. Of relevance to us – according to the new iPhone, the Taj Mahal can now be found in Brighton.

I really enjoyed this. I like the idea of following their directions:

“Walk 50 yds… Turn left at Harry Ramsden’s… Keep straight past Venus Hair Design… You have reached the Taj Mahal.”

Other elements of Brighton have actually disappeared according to the device – the clock tower, for example. But obviously that is not nearly so hilarious as the appearance of an enormous palace. I have scoured the internet to see whether or not other cities have recently received world wonders – ‘Hull acquire two pyramids’, for example, but it seems we’re the only ones.

I don’t tend to notice how reliant I am on technology until it goes wrong. A former deputy editor at The Times who gave a guest speech in college last week conceded he would be lost without his iPhone, and I’m sure he’s not the only one. It is very easy to throw blind faith at applications like maps with a successful track record, but it’s worth reminding ourselves that they are not infallible.

Being a horrible map reader myself I am a little reluctant to return to a fold-out one, but maybe it’s worth considering. As we stride into winter winds they may require a certain amount of wrangling once open, but then there’s always the compass. I don’t know how they work, but if I needed directions I could throw one at passers by.

I’m also a becoming a little overwhelmed by the range of aps available. Last week I read a review of a new one for women, the Wonder Clock, which confronts the question “how much time do I have left?” by filling the screen with an enormous pink countdown of your remaining hours, minutes and days of fertility. I can imagine no better way for a woman to fill a silence during a first date.

“That ticking? Oh it’s just the haunting sound of my ovaries. How is your soup?”

Technology is going mad.

I’m going back to my 3210 with its Purple Ronnie fascia. Scrap that, I’m just going to pay people impromptu visits, holding up a chalkboard next to my face with what I would’ve sent in a text written on it.


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